Hope and new beginnings

Since Evelyn's first birthday, and as the year draws to a close, I find myself both nostalgic and hopeful. Nostalgic about the many wonderful memories we have made with Evie, and hopeful as I look ahead to her future and ours. This past year has been a year full of "firsts," starting with welcoming our first child, the lovely "li'l miss," into the world. In the weeks and months that would follow, Evie would learn and teach us so many things. She would help us test the limits of sleep-deprivation, patience and teamwork. At the same time, she would show us how little we previously knew about unconditional love, and how deep that love could run. She would evoke the proud lioness in her mother, and ever-vigilant protector in her father. She would learn to smile with her eyes, and laugh contagiously. She melted my heart. She would reach, grab, pull, creep, crawl and eventually walk forward in this world with a sense of determination that most adults could only envy.

Looking ahead, I have many, many hopes for Evelyn's future. As of yet, she is bounded only by her age. She is not jaded, and doesn't know what it means to be self-conscious. She hasn't experienced cruelty nor true loss. The pressures of a culture that often moves too fast are unknown to her. A part of me wishes it could stay that way, that somehow we could keep her from all that might harm or upset her. Another part of me knows that isn't possible, and hopes that instead, we can help teach her to be the kind of woman I aspire to be but sometimes fall short.

To that end, I hope that Evie is kind and thoughtful. I hope that she leaves her mark on the world by giving more than she takes. I hope she knows not only the unconditional love of her parents, which we will always give her, but that she also knows what it is to love someone that way that I love her dad...looking at the future hand-in-hand and knowing that whatever comes, you will face it together. I hope that she understands the value of true friendship, of being able to be yourself, flaws and all, and know that your true friends will accept and appreciate you all the more for them. I hope that she is forgiving and merciful, and knows the difference between self-preservation and selfishness. I hope she is loyal and strong. I hope that Evie believes in herself. I hope that she never measures success in dollars and learns that it's getting back up that counts, not the fall. I hope her imagination soars, and that fear motivates rather than debilatates her. I hope Evie really sees the world, and is awed by the amazing places and people in it. I hope that Evie can always laugh at herself, but does not laugh at the expense of others. I hope that she sings like no one is listening and dances like no one is watching. It may be an old cliche, but both are good for the soul.

Most of all, I hope that Evie lives a long, happy and fulfilling life. Evie has brought so much happiness to our lives, and deserves all the joy in the world. I think all children do. As parents, it's our job to help that happen, to teach our children as much and as best as we can, to support and nurture them. As we begin a new year of Evie's life and head into 2010, I know what my New Year's resolution will be - to be a better parent for Evie, to better model the values and characteristics I hope she will have, and more closely resemble the woman I hope she will become. Here's to a wonderful year with the li'l miss, and many more to come!